Return


1

The sun was blazing away in all its fury as if to boil all the seas and bake the entire earth into dry powdery cakes. The wind had gone berserk huffing and puffing in fury hurling the sand all around, scattering it all around. Under the combined onslaught of the sun and wind the land lay wasted. Wherever one looked, all that could be seen were huge expanses of sand. There was no sign of life to be seen anywhere. It was just the sands stoically bearing the pain inflicted on it by its tormentors. Amidst the swirling sands, one could trace a distant figure - A lone falcon in the sky.


The falcon braved his way through to the center of the sand storm. In the center of the storm, stood a strange four legged creature with a curved pointed snout, slanting eyes, square tipped ears, red mane and a forked tail. The falcon alighted on the ground and turned into a man with the head of a falcon. The beast immediately lunged at the falcon man. But the falcon man was an equal match for the grotesque beast. Man and beast fought on tirelessly. Neither seemed to tire! As time passed the fight grew more intense. Their fury eclipsed that of the sun and the wind.

The sun had actually toned down its intensity and the wind had become mild as if both were bowing down in respect to the true masters. The two were so evenly matched that it seemed the fight would never end. Unless there was some intervention, a divine intervention! And the intervention came in the form of a jackal -a ferocious looking one that was lumbering through the sands towards the combatants. When it reached the two combatants, the jackal struck its head on the floor and emerged as a man with the head of a jackal. With the coming of the jackal man to support him, the falcon man clearly had the edge and soon the beast was vanquished.

"You are now defeated, Seth. Stand up and face the punishment for your evil deeds, you vile creature."

The defeated beast now transformed into a man with the head of an animal with a pointed snout.

"You also want to be a God slayer like me, Horus? Come. Kill me. Avenge your father. Or would you want your bastard brother Anubis to do the dirty work for you?"

"You think you can trick us in to sending you to plague the world of the dead from the world of the living? That you shall not! Nor will your vile stench foul the world of the living. You shall be suspended for infinitum in the stasis between the world of the living and the world of the dead! "

Thus saying Horus seized hold of Set and began to drag him away, floating through the air. After what seemed like days, they found themselves in the midst of a dense forest. Right in front of them, they could discern a faint image of what looked like a dwelling lodged between the trees a few paces away. As the silvery beams of the full moon fell on it, the silhouette of a log cabin could be seen.

"This is the cabin of Anubis, the portal between the world of the living and the world of the dead. This is going to be your prison till the end of time. Your mind shall be bound on the side of the living and your body on the side of the dead."

Thus saying Anubis thrust Seth into the cabin and recited some incantations. Seth disappeared. Having accomplished his mission, it was time for Anubis to return to his half brother Horus.

2

One could see beads of sweat glistening on Horus' falcon beak. He looked very anxious. "Are you sure he is safe?"

"As safe as our laws allow. Seth's powers are limited to Anubis' cabin. He can have mental influence on the side of the living and physical influence on the side of the dead. The dead are beyond any physical harm and I doubt any human will ever come within the confines of the cabin to fall under Seth's mental influence. The cabin is visible to the human eye only on a full moon light. And on such nights, my devoted jackals will guard the cabin to keep humans away. So no way a human will ever enter the cabin"

"But what if a human does enter the cabin on a full moon night getting past the jackals?"

"If a human were to enter the cabin, Seth can communicate with the human, can influence him or even take full control of his mind. But the control will last only within the confines of the cabin."

Horus was still not satisfied. "This seems perfect. In fact too perfect, which you know if not allowed. Any creation must have a tiny flaw at the core of its existence as per the ancient and inviolable law of the ancients. So what is the catch here?"

Anubis nodded knowingly. "Well. If a human were to willingly carry the mind of Seth into the world of the living, Seth can have influence in the world of the living through the body of the person as long as he is alive. And on his death, Seth's mind will join his body in the world of the dead. However the human has to willingly invite Seth into his mind. So Seth cannot control the mind of the human and influence him to take him into his mind. So the minute Seth takes control of a human entering the cabin, he himself closes his one door of escape. Subtle, isn’t it?"


3

The door of the cabin opened. The young man had returned. The mind of Seth seemed to welcome him joyously. Perhaps his redemption was at hand. At last, the time had come for Seth to return.

Previous Episode   : Wish
Next Episode        :  The Twelve Month Wonder

54 comments:

Gyanban said...

nicely done, good flow and good content.

Ritu Lalit said...

Interesting one ... Am off to read the rest

Rumya said...

I've read the first two parts and now have read the third one too. The wait was too long!! Glad to see you return with Return TF.
About the story, it was as gripping as the previous parts. Its no secret that I am fascinated by Ancient Egyptian Culture and Gods. I see a connection here.
Waiting for Part 4!!

The Fool said...

Thanks, Ritu.

Sid said...

Aaah and so you return eh.... :D remember I am going to kill you for keeping me hanging for the next part.

Engrossing read as always, yet I am unhappy that I could not read the climax and it is killing me.

Cheers,
Sid

Someone Is Special said...

Wow! you are continuing you story for blog-a-ton that's very much appreciated.. Very tough task.. Hatts off man...

All the best for BAT..

Someone Is Special

--Someone Is Special--

Amity said...

Ah, a comeback...return? of the classics!

I wish I am a goddess and be part of the characters in your story, Lols! :)

Good morning to you and all the Best for BAT14!

RiikaInfinityy said...

First time here and first I would like to say I love your blog name!=D Second, I love the flow of the story and seeing you actually link the story in parts during BAT, it is just amazing, and I think I will check the previous parts out too =P This is my first time participation, good luck on BAT^^~

The Fool said...

Thanks Gyanban.

The Fool said...

Thanks, Rumya. I was aware of your fascination with Egyptian culture, Rumya. I am planning to bring more of Egyptian mythology as the story proceeds. Actually Seth is a very fascinating character.

The Fool said...

Lol. Thanks Sid. I am trying to have sufficient build up and story development so that the climx will be really worth it as and when it comes.

The Fool said...

Thanks a lot, SIS.

The Fool said...

Thanks, Amity. Maybe I should insert you as a Goddess into the story. Which one do you want to be? Hathor, Nepthys or Isis? Best of luck to you too for the Baton. Shall check out your post soon.

The Fool said...

Thanks Riika. My first post on the blog has the reason for my blog name in case your curious. Do check out the othe rparts too. Welcome to Blog-a-ton. I am becoming something of a veteral here. This is my 6th one here. 4 more to go before I join offcial veterans list. Shall check out your post soon.

Dreamer said...

Egyptian Mythology has always fascinated me. Your story made for a throughly enjoyable read. All the best!

Vikas Khair said...

What else can be said?

besides Bravo what a wonderful task achieved.
Very Good work keep it up.

Sidrasayeed said...

crafty to say the least. I think it carried its weight. Beginning from the descriptive start until the simple end, the story carried itself.

Tikuli said...

Wow great post .. loved the crafty treatment of the prompt
Best

Kevin said...

An engaging mythical post!
Cheerz !

The Fool said...

Thanks Tikulu. The prompts are guiding my story. Actually goodbye was also a nice prompt. Unfortunately I was too busy at that time and could not use it.

The Fool said...

Thanks Rakha. All mythologies are fascinating. ATB to you too. Will be checking out your post over the week.

Ms.Meduri said...

wonderfully written...njoyed the read..!!!

The Fool said...

Thanks Dreamer. Glad you enjoyed my story.

The Fool said...

Thanks Ms Medhuri.

The Fool said...

Thanks for your kind words, Vikas.

Raksha Raman said...

I'm a great fan of Indian mythology but this is my first stint with a story based on Egyptian culture! The names of the characters sound sexy though! :P Neat narration. ATB with BAT.

Raksha Raman - Return

The Fool said...

Thanks a lot, Sidra. Though the end is simple as a stand alone, it is any answer to question raised by previous episodes of the story.

The Fool said...

Thanks Kevin.

Muddassir Shah said...

Ah! sure you did some research for this job :)
very good mix of facts and fiction.

The Fool said...

Thanks Mudassir. Did not really have to do much research as such as I have read quite a bit about Egyptian Gods. Lot of writers teleserials have made good use of them, notably one of my favorite serials Stargate SG-1

Bsingh17 said...

Panchatantra meet The Mummy !! :P
Who doesnt love the romance of the ancients and the wild adventures that follow?
Think its time to revisit your posts frm the previous Batom's and connect the dots !!

Abhishek Sikdar said...

Interesting post. The Egyptians should certainly read this! But I'm curious as to why you decided to wait for the BAT to continue the series?

D2
http://d2writering.blogspot.com/

The Fool said...

Actually I have the broad story line in my mind. But somehow the Blog-aton prompts seem to inspire me to design individual chapters. Also Blog-a-ton gives you higher readership than normal times. I doubt if too many people are still hooked on to the series sufficiently to read the rest of the chapters without it being part of a contest.

The Fool said...

Do check out the rest. And do follow the rest of the story. Once Seth enters the 21st century there is going to be fireworks. But the next part probably withh come along with next Baton.

The Fool said...

No really, Manjunath. These are names of Egyptian Gods.

Parul said...

I have been following this series of stories on your blog. So it added to my enjoyment, and I do have to come back to read the next part too :-)
All the best for BAT.

Manjunath said...

Egyptian names are good....Any Egyptian friend of yours? Would be interesting to check the comments, if this is posted on some Egyptian blog collection ;)

The Fool said...

Thanks Karthik. I was wondering what you would think of the new direction to the story. Actually I have a very hazy idea at a conceptual level. But Blog-a-ton topic decided what topic comes where. If I had participated in last Blog-a-ton, there would have been a chapter showing further evolution of Sanket's character without resolving the mystery of the hidden cabin. But now that chapter has to come after this.

You have singled out my favorite line for praise. I read this concept in a fantasy book by one Stephen Donaldson. It says all creation is based on flaws whereas absolute perfection is nameless, formless infinity. Really liked it. So used it here.

The Fool said...

Thanks Parul for following the story. Do look forward to see you for the next part.

Naveen kumar said...

nice work .. am here for the first time .. will surely "return" for your next chapter

Vitthal Patil said...

Horus, Anubis I likes these names. Seth didn't gell with these names but its the writer's choice so no complaints :-). I luved your style of narration. ATB for BAT.

foolthe said...

Thanks Naveen. Do return for the second part.

Karthik325 said...

Thanks Vittal. I have not invented the names. These are real Gods from Egyptian mythology.

Kshitij said...

ahEM. Ok.

I had tried to get a hang 5-6 days ago but failed. I decided to return later. And today, I am left with just 3 posts to read so I returned.

And at the end of the story did I realize what was happening.. and the fact that there are 2 previous parts to this one. I must say that it was very tough to treat this 'individually'.. but yes, I did need to concentrate much harder :)

Talking about wholesomeness of the post, I would have defnitely liked an end to it.. I mean a distinct ending or something.. at the moment it looks a little to-be-followed kind of thing.

All said and done, I still admire your dedication to it.

So, tell me something - have you already gotten a story in mind or you're adding basis the topic that gets selected for BAT?

I think your idea is great... but I would personally not have used it for BAT. I think BAT needs individual posts... but then that's what I think... and you can happily discard me :)

Nevertheless, I like the imagination here... would have loved a couple of pics for sure... how about getting us to see the characters of the story.

The names are great.. though Seth sounds Indian, but I think chalta hai :)

Kshitij said...

'would have liked an end' means that since you are treating each part as individual, I needed to see something concrete at the end.

Of course I know the story moves further in the next edition.

Karthik said...

Do have the end in mind? or coming up with the chapters as per the topics of blogaton? Just curious.
Either ways, it's getting better with each chapter. After the first two chapters, this one was a bit of a surprise, and I liked it. The idea is fascinating.
For me, the heart of the story lay in the second section: "Any creation must have a tiny flaw at the core of its existence as per the ancient and inviolable law of the ancients." Too good. And I firmly believe that the beginning of a story, the first para and sometimes even the first line, is the most important aspect. I loved the first para here.
Hope to read the next part soon.
All the best!

The Fool said...

Thanks Naveen. Do return for the second part.

Kshitij said...

Aha! Mythology in your words. Hmmm. Am getting a hang of what you are doing. Yes, perhaps, the initial 2 posts were good as individuals. This one, I feel, is definitely not the best I expect from you. I expect much more.

You know.. moreover.. I think, for the readers, it will become very tough to separate the chapters from the whole story.. and I am not sure how much respect your individual chapters will get. I think you'd like the chapters or posts to get respect individuals posts deserve. If you ask me - I say you continue the series but outside BAT.

Another thing is - I might not be the best person to comment. This is my first BAT and am commenting from a newbie's perspective.

For pics - I think you should bring em on. :)

Kshitij said...

a. I am having to come back again and again to check if you responded. So, please respond.

and b. I want to commend you for the the kind of comments you are leaving for people. Really like you for being straight and not sugary. Good job on commenting.

The Fool said...

Thanks for your candid feedback, Kshitij. I am wondering whether I should continue this story on Blog-a-ton or continue it outside Blog-a-ton. I was trying this as an experiment of my theory that to make a good novel, every chapter should be enjoyable by itself. But this chapter does not seem to have worked as much as the other 2 chapters as an independent post. Or maybe this chapter did not create sufficient interest by itself. I need to think.

I have a broad story in mind and am trying to work out the details along the Blog-aton topics path. Yeah, pictures! Somehow I have always been a traditionalist and not used pictures on my posts. But I should try picture. The names are not invented by me. They are the Egyptian Gods and the story is also not mine. Seth and Osiris were brothers and Seth killed Osiris and Horus took revenge on him. Anubis was Osiris' son through Seth's wife and the God of the underworld. I was just trying to retell the story in my words and work it as part of my story - where Seth the god of evil and chaos returns to the 21st century world.

The Fool said...

Actually nice of you to come back and check if I responded. Even I do thatmost of the time and I get disappointed if people have not responded. Usually if someone does not respond to my comment, I actually never visit their blog again.
Incidentally I was also appreciative of the kind of comments you seem to be leaving. Was planning to drop you a note of appreciation for your comments. And thanks for appreciating my comments. I used to do that earlier and I had lost enthusiasm this time and actually mys enthusiasm was revived by seeing your comments. And reply to your other comment below. (I have actually installed disqus instead of the original blogspot comments so that my replies reach the mailbox of commentors who don't bother to come back and check if I have replied)

The Fool said...

Actually I though Seth being imprisoned was some kind of an end. The last section was just a link to the other chapters. But I think I will take your advice and run the big story separate from Blog-a-ton from now on. And you maybe a newbie to blog-a-ton but not to blogs and contests. You were my favorite among the new bloggers (other than the ones I already know and ike from Blog-a-ton, Indimag ) I got introduced to in BPL. So your views are highly appreciated.

Kshitij said...

Thank you :)
Let's pledge to remain honest while commenting.. and not sugary :)

Kshitij said...

Happy to read that :) Means much.

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